suspicious toffee crisp wrapper found up grandmas snatch

I was flicking through endless bile on sky television prior to this of course but later this evening when i happened upon the outlandish and cheesy American soap opera days of our lives, i entered mid scene with a young couple a man and a very distraught and tearful wife sitting at a kitchen table asking a sitting, drowsy and very near death grandma " who did it grandma, please tell us pleeease" grandma just sat there swaying and moaning like Derek Acorah in 25 Cromwell street, which lead me to believe that she had been molested by a poltergeist and the perpetrator was still in the act and that's where it fucking left me. now i have to sleep, but not until i check the TV guide to find out when i can can catch the next episode just to put my mind at rest she hasn't been followed home from a seance, that's how they suck you in bastards.